Toothpick
by Jade Moira Lawrence
spare up the patterns from your dirty knuckles
& toothpick pleasure with a violent tongue
I wonder if my dead ex lover is dancing in Hell
or surviving in Heaven
a Mother once told me
“your dialect will be a Man's ruin”
pull back the clouds like a lover's breath
& punch out the stars vigorously
does a breath always know it's heavy?
we seem to be taking too many left turns here
& we are always one sentence away from losing everything
give hope the hands it needs to moisturise
& a smile from a child in War will haunt the broadcasters
I'm a guest hosting your name
& he's burnt the mushrooms again
you're a divine numbing spell
& look at how you tire me to your bed
All Lines of my Mother's History told as a YouTube Newsclip
My mum goes for a piss.
Fluctuating between girlhood & womanhood,
this is a chaotic conversation with age here.
Her Northern language is honey & I wonder
if my belly can maintain all the knives of dialect.
Swordfishes clutching crabs my sternum rips
as every bleed is a film take.
In my self proclaimed orgasm,
tsunamis scream to be soft & earthquakes
kneel themselves to quietness.
A dog chews off a doll's head.
The feet constantly drag & the slaps still sting.
She became less woman when I became more God.
She reminds me to own my name with religion's breath
warming my throat.
My son needs more of her love.
The spoon smacks my cup, an imbecile.
The sighs sound, echoing through an unloved orchestra.
Bodies are being catered away. Violence cannot keep us moving.
She throws herself into comedy, truth riles her feathers.
Her memories bland, repeating for flavour.
Rinse and soak all lines of history.
Guess I'm more like my dad, whose name you refuse
to drop on my skin.
At times I'm a terrible but tender mess.
My ribs need rope.
Go ahead & save your god-damn self.
About the Poet: Jade Moira Lawrence is a mixed heritage poet and writer from south London. She originally trained and worked as an actor for the Stage and Screen before transitioning into writing in 2010. Her work has been featured in Visual Verse and Honey and Lime Lit Magazine. She has performed her poetry at Poet's Corner Brixton, Spoken Word London and The BCA (Black Cultural Archives).